Baccalaureate Service

I want so desperately to post about the events surrounding my daughter's high school graduation. All I can really think to show is the shoes we wore. The clothes we choose.
Very deep, right?

Actually I am in in limbo. I can't make anything.

I can't remember anything.

I cannot form full...

I am in a holding pattern, hovering as Allie spends her lasts days as a full time resident in my care. I don't want to start any projects. I don't even want to water the plants in pots. They are dead. Dead. Dead dead. Yellow. Awful. I can't even throw them away. I just hover in the present moment. With all the words.

Words, words, words in my head that scatter and fall into each other and build up like in Tetris until I can't sleep or breathe even.

Deep breaths. Agitation and dark thoughts as I teeter on the brink of depression. Not gonna. Not gonna fall into that and pudding through these last days of summer, before she moves away, out of state.

You can tell me she will still need me. I know that. Having buried my own mother shows me how difficult it is to live without Mother. But for sure this is a transition from her residency and my full time service into something else.

And it's going exactly like its supposed to...

May Happened

Here is my collage of pictures for May. The color was 'sunshine,' as you can see for my Photo365 challenge.

I so dearly appreciate the commiseration regarding my bicycle accident and hand injury. I am happy to report after thorough imaging studies, I did not break my hand. It has been 5 weeks and I am still wearing a brace. I'm having return of movement but still cannot grasp or bear weight. The recovery has been slow but I see progress.  Kinda of like many of life's injuries.

My daughter has graduated and enrolled in college. I have so many things to say about it all. Somehow I am loathe to articulate it. Still processing I guess. Those posts have not written themselves yet. They start only to sputter and disintegrate. I am feeling the feelings, a victory, however painful, and not able to write about it all to my satisfaction quite yet...

For now I can say this about my daughter's high school graduation, I bought cute shoes. And baby steps have been taken. Sometimes backwards...